more thoughts before another confinement
im not sure about any others out there. one thing i really hate is when i'm idle. that is, when the mind isn't working. either when it's brainless work ("move this here, move that there, and don't ask why.") or just plain idling ("just sit there, don't sleep, don't play and don't read"). i know some people are quite capable of spacing out anywhere they like. unfortunately im not capable of that feat and it's not a nice feeling knowing your brain is just rotting away.
...
something's been bugging me since my gp teacher told me there must be some deep-rooted reason for my cynicism. not that i think im really cynical or anything. but most studies show that it is always something that happened during childhood that affects your behaviour for the rest of your life. and i've been trying to find out what it is since then. and i think i might have found it just today. it is my belief that only 4 people in the world knows of this event ever happening to me, and only i know what kind of impact and why it has had.
it was rather interesting, since i was reading a book about commitment today. (does anybody ever wonder why most relationship books are written for women instead of male readers?) and i guess i still fall into most guy's "avoidance" label. i haven't finished but there are some interesting points, which i might write later. i'm still primarily a guy with male instincts, im afraid, even though most times i don't seem to behave like a typical testosterone-charged guy should.
...
was also thinking about women's rights campaign (again). and the fight for equality and stuff. the thing i found weird was, you see, equality can really never be achieved, simply because differences between the sexes amounts to more than just differences between the sex organs and the plumbing. there are some innate differences, such as females having more brain synapses within the cerebellum and guy's having more compartmentalised brain functions.
and since im so used to the style of gp writing, let's use point example structure to think things through. a man can go around having one night stands, have thousands of lovers, and goes around bragging about this. this actually increases his social status (one way or the other, if you look at the famous playboys and who they are you'd know what i mean). now, sure women can go and do this nowadays, with the increased earning power and all. but would you want to? minus the social stigma, which can be argued to be artificial, im pretty sure most women would be disgusted with themselves should they fall to that. heck, a guy having gone through 10 girlfriends / wives wouldn't feel a damn thing (or so it seems, who knows what they really feel), but a woman going through 3 relationships would be scarred for life.
(i speak of this knowing a few people with relationship troubles. ever wonder why guys never go for relationship counselling?)
and for those who would prefer concrete evidences, i submit an independant study done in 1996 by mineesota (not sure if the spelling is correct). they asked a handsome/ beautiful person of the opposite gender to approach young adults, asking one of three questions. (a) would you go out on a date with me? (b) would you like to come to my apartment? (c) would you like to have sex with me?
please note that the questions were posed on the first meeting.
for women, 50% said yes to (a), 6% to (b) and none to (c)
for men, the results were 50% said yes to (a), 60% said yes to (b) and 75% said yes to (c)
the debate is still out on why this is so, but so far most people agree that women are more commitment oriented. that doesn't mean men don't want love and just want sex, but admittedly the perspectives are slightly different.
...
now that i've got to that, i thought i might have another bombshell to drop.
as much as i grumble and complain about national service, i thought it was quite fitting an exchange. no, i do not mean that we should serve whoever's up there because it's our duty and all, but i do believe it evens out the scales in what we go through.
apart from natural biological functions, which any woman will tell you is rather much of a hassle, they also go through childbirth agonies (something which i can never possibly relate), pick up the lion's share of the housework and also have the major role when it comes to kids. i kinda really respect those who've got it altogether. HOW do you juggle a career, kids, housework and groceries with everything else?
2 years of hell and a little something else every year after that. im not happy about it, but it kind of evens the playing field, personally speaking. which is why i grumble and grumble but i'll still go, i guess, just so that i can assuage my conscience and say i've had my share of suffering and not be high and mighty on the y chromosome.
...
who knows when the next time will be before i have something interesting to write? i sure have a lot of time to think and wonder now but not much to spare in the way of time and energy.
...
something's been bugging me since my gp teacher told me there must be some deep-rooted reason for my cynicism. not that i think im really cynical or anything. but most studies show that it is always something that happened during childhood that affects your behaviour for the rest of your life. and i've been trying to find out what it is since then. and i think i might have found it just today. it is my belief that only 4 people in the world knows of this event ever happening to me, and only i know what kind of impact and why it has had.
it was rather interesting, since i was reading a book about commitment today. (does anybody ever wonder why most relationship books are written for women instead of male readers?) and i guess i still fall into most guy's "avoidance" label. i haven't finished but there are some interesting points, which i might write later. i'm still primarily a guy with male instincts, im afraid, even though most times i don't seem to behave like a typical testosterone-charged guy should.
...
was also thinking about women's rights campaign (again). and the fight for equality and stuff. the thing i found weird was, you see, equality can really never be achieved, simply because differences between the sexes amounts to more than just differences between the sex organs and the plumbing. there are some innate differences, such as females having more brain synapses within the cerebellum and guy's having more compartmentalised brain functions.
and since im so used to the style of gp writing, let's use point example structure to think things through. a man can go around having one night stands, have thousands of lovers, and goes around bragging about this. this actually increases his social status (one way or the other, if you look at the famous playboys and who they are you'd know what i mean). now, sure women can go and do this nowadays, with the increased earning power and all. but would you want to? minus the social stigma, which can be argued to be artificial, im pretty sure most women would be disgusted with themselves should they fall to that. heck, a guy having gone through 10 girlfriends / wives wouldn't feel a damn thing (or so it seems, who knows what they really feel), but a woman going through 3 relationships would be scarred for life.
(i speak of this knowing a few people with relationship troubles. ever wonder why guys never go for relationship counselling?)
and for those who would prefer concrete evidences, i submit an independant study done in 1996 by mineesota (not sure if the spelling is correct). they asked a handsome/ beautiful person of the opposite gender to approach young adults, asking one of three questions. (a) would you go out on a date with me? (b) would you like to come to my apartment? (c) would you like to have sex with me?
please note that the questions were posed on the first meeting.
for women, 50% said yes to (a), 6% to (b) and none to (c)
for men, the results were 50% said yes to (a), 60% said yes to (b) and 75% said yes to (c)
the debate is still out on why this is so, but so far most people agree that women are more commitment oriented. that doesn't mean men don't want love and just want sex, but admittedly the perspectives are slightly different.
...
now that i've got to that, i thought i might have another bombshell to drop.
as much as i grumble and complain about national service, i thought it was quite fitting an exchange. no, i do not mean that we should serve whoever's up there because it's our duty and all, but i do believe it evens out the scales in what we go through.
apart from natural biological functions, which any woman will tell you is rather much of a hassle, they also go through childbirth agonies (something which i can never possibly relate), pick up the lion's share of the housework and also have the major role when it comes to kids. i kinda really respect those who've got it altogether. HOW do you juggle a career, kids, housework and groceries with everything else?
2 years of hell and a little something else every year after that. im not happy about it, but it kind of evens the playing field, personally speaking. which is why i grumble and grumble but i'll still go, i guess, just so that i can assuage my conscience and say i've had my share of suffering and not be high and mighty on the y chromosome.
...
who knows when the next time will be before i have something interesting to write? i sure have a lot of time to think and wonder now but not much to spare in the way of time and energy.
posted by CHENZ | 8:47 AM
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