nothing new... and short jokes
heehee, found a new song to add here. won't add so soon because this one is still ok. i'll prolly change it when i come back from china, since it'll have more relevance then. more details when i change the thing, of course.
think i've figured out why i don't like the normal "hollywood" kinda action shows or horror shows... there's nothing much to learn. at least when you watch drama there's always something about life to pick up...
speaking of hollywood, there are a few rules hollywood films ALWAYS follow. see how many rules you can spot next time you watch these shows =P
...
rule #1: in horror movies, the nightwatchman on duty will always be killed within 20 seconds of screentime.
rule #2: washrooms are never used for "relief". instead they are meeting centres for drugs, murders, deals etc etc.
rule #3: the main antagonist will die at least twice. (one in history/flashback but somehow miraculously survives, one in the middle of the movie but is a clever fake, and one real time near the end, which means it's about time to pack up and leave)
rule #4: if a telephone comes into focus, it's going to ring in 5 seconds
rule #5: when a weak woman (your proverbial "damsel in distress") fires a gun, there are three actions that follow (a) drop gun (b) sink to knees/collapse (c) wail
rule #6: when the antagonist flees in a vehicle, there is always a handy unmanned vehicle ripe for the taking in the vicinity, and the owner won't say anything about the protagonist taking it for free.
rule #7: the protagonists always have x-ray eyes,because they can drive through any terrain including busy marketplaces and not have any accidents.
rule #8: nobody can see a person hiding behind the driver's seat, no matter how large he is.
rule #9: when cornered, the antagonist will always climb higher and higher, even though that would only mean that he gets trapped and won't allow him to get away.
rule #10: when in a fight scene, no matter how many bad guys there are, they will only attack one at a time, while the rest of them jump up and down striking poses.
rule #11: no matter how injured the protagonist gets, he will still be up and active, never collapsing.
rule #12: the protagonist can go on and on with his heroic acts no matter how injured he is, but when the main actress treats his wounds he'll grimace in pain like it's gonna kill him.
rule #13: the main actress is almost always a professional in some field (who says you can't combine brains and beauty?)
rule #14: no matter how dire the situation or how often attacks are made, the protagonist couple is never disturbed at night to do what they like.
rule #15: bedsheets and blankets are "L" shaped, allowing the male lead's heavily-muscled body to be exposed while covering the female lead's body parts.
...
hmm, if i find more i'll list them here =P
think i've figured out why i don't like the normal "hollywood" kinda action shows or horror shows... there's nothing much to learn. at least when you watch drama there's always something about life to pick up...
speaking of hollywood, there are a few rules hollywood films ALWAYS follow. see how many rules you can spot next time you watch these shows =P
...
rule #1: in horror movies, the nightwatchman on duty will always be killed within 20 seconds of screentime.
rule #2: washrooms are never used for "relief". instead they are meeting centres for drugs, murders, deals etc etc.
rule #3: the main antagonist will die at least twice. (one in history/flashback but somehow miraculously survives, one in the middle of the movie but is a clever fake, and one real time near the end, which means it's about time to pack up and leave)
rule #4: if a telephone comes into focus, it's going to ring in 5 seconds
rule #5: when a weak woman (your proverbial "damsel in distress") fires a gun, there are three actions that follow (a) drop gun (b) sink to knees/collapse (c) wail
rule #6: when the antagonist flees in a vehicle, there is always a handy unmanned vehicle ripe for the taking in the vicinity, and the owner won't say anything about the protagonist taking it for free.
rule #7: the protagonists always have x-ray eyes,because they can drive through any terrain including busy marketplaces and not have any accidents.
rule #8: nobody can see a person hiding behind the driver's seat, no matter how large he is.
rule #9: when cornered, the antagonist will always climb higher and higher, even though that would only mean that he gets trapped and won't allow him to get away.
rule #10: when in a fight scene, no matter how many bad guys there are, they will only attack one at a time, while the rest of them jump up and down striking poses.
rule #11: no matter how injured the protagonist gets, he will still be up and active, never collapsing.
rule #12: the protagonist can go on and on with his heroic acts no matter how injured he is, but when the main actress treats his wounds he'll grimace in pain like it's gonna kill him.
rule #13: the main actress is almost always a professional in some field (who says you can't combine brains and beauty?)
rule #14: no matter how dire the situation or how often attacks are made, the protagonist couple is never disturbed at night to do what they like.
rule #15: bedsheets and blankets are "L" shaped, allowing the male lead's heavily-muscled body to be exposed while covering the female lead's body parts.
...
hmm, if i find more i'll list them here =P
posted by CHENZ | 8:02 AM
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